The fluid boundary between my space and yours



When I am completely conscious and fully aware, I dislike the idea of criticising, poking fun (not harmless!), public shaming, trolling, etc which only spreads negativity in the world and is not healthy in general. I came across this post by some uncle on Facebook about his experience sitting next to a newly wed couple and he describes this as being worse than sitting next to someone with a little baby. There were moments when he exaggerated little things that go unnoticed just to make it a funnier read. Surely, it could touch either the right or the wrong nerve and it’s really up to the reader since there’s no way to confirm the tone/ intentions of the writer. Although I’d have thought the same thoughts if I were in his position, my first instinct was to bash him and say “Dude, come on, just because you’ve lost love over the last 37 years of marriage, doesn’t mean you make fun of people who’ve still got it!” Within a second, I stopped to reflect on my instincts and realised that the only reason I wanted to say that was just because I could!

So, this is exactly the root of our problems. We always do things just because we can. We troll because we can. We are racist because we can. We rape because we can and so on. And then we blame it on the victim for overexposure of thoughts, skin and what not. Somehow, someone’s choice to express freely, begins to infringe on our personal space because the boundary between their personal space and ours is completely fluid and open to interpretation by either parties, which has only further been liquified by social media. Most of the time, as a lame reader we could be oblivious to this negativity, unless of course we decide to read the comments section of any post which is almost always filled with a bunch of hateful messages. Sure, you might think its stupid to read it but just in case you ever do, it makes you really sad to see that there are people in this world with no happiness to spread.

Just like we CAN spread hatred and negativity, we CAN also take a few minutes to think about how our actions could alter another life (person, animal, plant, whatever!) just to see if we still want to do what we’d set out to say/ do in the first place because not everybody is cool enough to not give a damn about what others say. If you still feel very strongly about doing something just because you can, go ahead and do it, because nobody can stop you. It takes a lot of effort to empathise and say or do nice things and so, I don’t blame you for chickening out because all of us are lazy and stupid sometimes. But I just pray that whoever is going to be a victim of your wrath is smart enough to make you re-consider in the future.

P.S – I experience this sort of dilemma very often as a blogger despite being very cautious of my subject’s sentiments. Surely, I don’t make the best call all the time but I try.


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