Living for social approval

approval

Growing up, I was forbidden from doing several things (being “too” fashionable, drinking, dating, etc.) and the number one reason presented to me had something to do with how the society would perceive it. As you can imagine, being a teenager, that never seemed like a good enough reason for me to care about. Why were these elders so obsessed with social approval that I didn’t necessarily care about? As far as my logical mind is concerned, I think you should do something if you want or not do it, if you don’t.

One of the things I do as Marriage Broker Auntie is to help people identify new channels to find potential spouse. Recently when I suggested to a client that she get on a few dating apps, it didn’t go down quite well with her as her family was concerned about what people would think about finding her on “Tinder” for instance. Now, first of all, I don’t think your pakkad mane aunty would be on Tinder to find you, and even if she did, hey what was she doing on Tinder now?! More importantly, why should you care given that she is not sweating to get you married.

If you haven’t already learnt from the internet, there will always be people who like what you do and some others who don’t. This is inevitable, but why should this change what you do with your life? Pakkad mane aunty thinks you are a slut, then thank god you saved yourself from being recommended to her narrow-minded bhatru nephew. It’s not only important for you to maintain a safe distance from your society, it’s also important for you to keep your distance from people who are obsessed with societal approval because they keep their word only as long as the world is watching.

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3 thoughts on “Living for social approval

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  1. Because no matter what you do, even if you hand people a million dollars, they will still have something to say about you!! They want the girl to get married, at the same time, her being on Tinder is “tobah tobah” Such BS.

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  2. Hi Priyanka,

    This has personal resonance with me and you know why! 😉
    I have no bones to pick with your argument in this post except to say that the general perception of dating apps, not just of Tinder, amongst parents is that it’s not a place to search for a person to marry. Parents generally tend to emphasise on the dating aspect of these sites which may or may not lead to marriage. This is the stumbling block for many parents. As a society, we are still transitioning. Even those who shower liberal benevolence on dating sites still go around looking for a lady “who hasn’t been around the block”! (heard this exact line from a ‘liberal’ schmuck) 😀

    Love,
    Aparna

    Like

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